Jan 23, 2012
Posted on Jan 23, 2012 | 1 comment
I suppose a definition is in order. What exactly is ‘Musterbation’?
Musterbation is allowing your life to be dominated by things you ‘must’ do. A must could be something as simple as taking out the garbage every week to paying your taxes. To be sure, we all have things we must do to survive (eat, sleep, drink water, pay taxes, breathe, etc.). But the insidious trap we can fall into is if our days turn into an endless session of musterbation. It basically means we have lost control of our lives.
How do we stop musterbating?
1- Say ‘no’ more often.
This probably the number one cause of musterbation. The inability to say no to others that make requests and demands of your time. Put a stop to it. The best way to do this is to…
2- Know what you want and organize your life to be, do, and have more of that.
Even though many of us have been taught to write down our goals, the reality is that most people have no freaking idea what they want. They go through life being carried along by the flow of the river without ever taking the time to really understand what it is they desire. Truly desire. And since nature abhors a vacuum, the lack of commitment to what you want opens up a gap in your life that will be filled with tasks and ‘must do’s’ from folks around you that know what they want. Congratulations sucker…their goals are now yours. But you can easily block this sort of behavior by changing your mindset that of a…
3) Be a Creator, not an Acquirer.
What do I mean by this? Most people set up their lives to be acquirers. Their goals are primarily related to having goals such as getting a house, a car, a million in the bank, etc. The problem with acquisition goals is that they force you to work on stuff outside of your mind to get what you want. Your power is pushed to the outside world where the object of your affection lies.
But have you ever thought about why you want something? Think about it for just a minute. You may have to ask “Why do I want this?” to yourself over and over.
For example, say you want a car. Ask yourself, “Why do I want this car?”. Then, when you answer it, ask yourself why you want that. Keep doing this enough and at some point you are going to arrive at a truth. The truth is that you don’t really want the thing…you want the feeling you think the thing will bring you.
Guess what? You can bypass the thing and go straight for the feeling. How? Simple. By focusing your attention and energy on the act of creation instead of attempting to acquire something.
So quit asking “What do I want.” and instead ask, “What do I want to create today?”.
This slight change in focus will work wonders to cure you of musterbation. It is the first step in creating the kind of authentic life you really desire. The type of life that leads to real, lasting happiness. Which, if you did the exercise above where you kept asking over and over again why you wanted something, is probably the exact feeling you were looking for when you set the goal, wasn’t it? You don’t need to acquire things to get that feeling. You get the feeling you are really looking for automatically when you focus your attention on being the creator you were born to be.
Jan 22, 2012
Posted on Jan 22, 2012 | 0 comments
Someone recently asked me how I was able to write a 93,000 word novel in less than three months. The answer is simple. I wrote something every day.
Now, the novel wasn’t ‘done’ in three months. It went to my editor and she returned it to me with a bunch of edit notes I needed to go through. Some things needed correcting and others I just left alone.
What I did find is that I wanted to make some big changes to the plot structure. This was because I had not spent any time outlining the book. I wrote it by the seat of my pants and it showed. As a result of my impatience in the beginning, I spent far more time ‘re-writing’ than I did writing.
My next book should avoid this fate. For one, I am using yWriter which really helps me structure things so the story flows smoothly. The ups are where the ups should be and the downs properly placed as well. Second, I have a much better idea of the type of story structure I like so I build them in at the beginning and then just write the story to get to the places I want to do.
So the secret to finishing a novel is to write everyday. But how much should you write? I don’t measure it in words because it is not important to me. My only caveat is that every single day, at 7 am (or earlier), I start writing. If I only write one word, then I have achieved my goal for the day and I am fine with that.
But you know this is a trick. I generally write a bunch more. The hardest part is just getting started but now that it’s a habit it’s not a big deal.
Try it. Write every day…even if it is only a single word. Within a few years you could be one of the most prolific authors on the planet.
Jan 20, 2012
Posted on Jan 20, 2012 | 0 comments
My first book, The Sequence, is done. Well, I’m done with it. The book is at my editor whom I am sure will find one of two mistakes in it…
The protagonist in this book is a woman named Shawna Davidson. She is a recent widow, having lost her husband to a plane crash. The insurance company won’t pay out because they think the death was a suicide. The loss of her husband’s income and a lack of savings force her to quit graduate school (she was going to Duke to become a genetic scientist). Quitting school means she has abandoned her dream of using her knowledge to develop a life saving drug that saves thousands of lives. To make ends meet, she gets a job working for a gene sequencing company that is under contract with the government to sequence the DNA of every US citizen. She is not miserable, per se, but she is not living up to her potential either (as measured by her standards). I think a lot of us can identify with Shawna.
I have started my next book and the hero in that is a woman as well. This got me to thinking about why I have chosen women to play such important roles in my first two novels. Here are my answers…
1- I like women. Soft and sensual on the one hand and tough as nails on the other. I like the extremes.
2- I don’t know women very well. Having made the trip around the sun 45 times and being married to one for over 18 years and you would think I would know something about women. Nope. But writing about them and giving them interesting roles let’s me see the world through their eyes. Perhaps when I am 90 I will understand them.
3- Women are complex and interesting. Men, on the other hand, are dipshits. Feed a man and give him an opportunity to release his seed from time to time and life is pretty damn good. Sit him on a LayZBoy in front of a sports channel displayed on a 60″ LCD and he’ll drool all over himself. If he could lick his testicles like the family dog, he would never leave the house.
4- I like feisty women. They scare the hell out of me but I like them. I remember a girl from high school. Her name was/is Michelle. I teased her one day about dating a younger guy (I was a dork and dating no-one at the time so I had no room to run my mouth but facts like this rarely stop me). She smacked the shit out of me for teasing her. It was at that point I realized that women are amazing. Michelle was/is for sure. (and no, I did not develop a fetish where I like women to beat up on me…at least one that I am willing to admit).
So there you have it. Four simple reasons why I like making the protagonist in my stories women. Not saying it will always be that way, but as you can tell, I have a lot of issues to explore. At least a dozen books worth.
Jan 2, 2012
Posted on Jan 2, 2012 | 0 comments
It’s that time of year again, when we say this year I am gonna <fill in the blank>. Most of the time we make these resolutions based on some kind of social pressure.
As in, I’m gonna lose some weight (because my momma says I am getting fat), gonna stop drinking (because I won the neighborhoods ‘most bottles recycled award’), and I’m gonna stop peeing in the yard (because, well, it seems like the right thing to do), etc.
While these are all good resolutions, most of them will be abandoned on a date that falls somewhere between January 1st and January 31st. Especially the last one…such is life.
Me? I said screw resolutions years ago (as well as most of the goals I dutifully wrote down in deference to the success gurus). As a result, my New Years routine has been much simplified as a result.
Here is what I do now…
1- I stop doing everything and take time to turn around and look at how far I have come over the year. Since I write in my journal just about every day so I will do a quick review of what I wrote over the year. The tears flow, the laughter comes, mostly in realization of just how absurd this thing called life is.
2- I think generally about what I might want to work on next…not in the new year mind you, but next. As in, right now.
I do plan to write another book in 2012 (The Discovery) and perhaps several more. My first book, The Sequence (which will be out this year) was a total bitch to write. Well, to be honest, writing it wasn’t so bad but re-writing it was and is the reason I think authors that call themselves Pantsers are self-loathing masochists. I love myself too much to put myself through that hell again. Goodbye pantsing, hello outlining!
And don’t forget the most important step…
3- After all this reflection and thinking, I sit on my back porch, eat a huge slice of pecan pie, drink a bottle of wine and pee in the yard…and then laugh with God at the absurdity of it all.
